Chubby Flier Rules Now in Effect at United

In Canada, obese people, or "fatties" if you will, are given the privilege an additional seat for the price of one, if they simply cannot fit in one seat. That won't be the case with anyone flying United Airlines though, because the company announced late last week that obese folks are required to buy a second ticket.

There's literally zero chance this doesn't a) end up in a court or b) cause some sort of really awkward domestic disturbance. Why? Just listen to the procedure.

As of Wednesday, passengers too large to fit comfortably in a coach seat may be required to buy a second ticket or upgrade to business class, where seats are larger -- if United's flight attendants can't find two open seats for them.

In other words, yes, this encounter could occur after said large person is on the plane, which is just beginning for a scene from Meet the Parents, only ... bigger. OR, alternately, a flight attendant could stop a large person on their way into the plane and ask them to purchase an additional ticket, only to have that person explain they're not that fat. (Hilarity/debate ensues, obviously.)

Personally, I'm fine with this policy. While it may seem somewhat discriminatory, it's a total and utter nightmare to end up sitting next to someone who does need two seats, and it's just an unfair way to spend a flight ... whereas having TWO seats is secretly kind of awesome.