'Always Sunny in Philadelphia' Musical, 'The Nightman Cometh' Is on a Real Tour [Dayman!]

Watch out, Broadway, because the boys (and lady) of Paddy's Pub -- the fictional bar from 'It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia' -- are going on a for realsies tour of America with 'The Nightman Cometh,' Charlie Day's musical from Season 4's finale.

Yes, that's right, the masters of karate and friendship for everyone will be hitting a city near you. Hopefully, anyway -- there are currently six shows listed on the tour. You can purchase tickets for five of them right now (the Beacon Theater in New York is currently unlisted) by visiting Live Nation (cue booing).

And the best part of the whole shindig? It's the actual actors -- Rob McElhenney (Mac), Day, Glenn Howerton (Dennis), Kaitlin Olson (Sweet Dee) and Danny DeVito (Frank) -- who will be performing.

The folks at FX warn that tickets will go on sale quickly, so join me in a Live Nation stare starting at 9 am tomorrow morning as we all attempt to get tickets for what is sure to go down as the best musical ever. Oh, also join me in watching internet weirdos recreating 'Dayman' in one of the best YouTube clips ever.

PETA Asks Phish to Change Name to 'Sea Kittens'

Quickly, for relevance purposes: people who listen to a lot of Phish travel frequently, and Phish's new green travel blog is known as "Traveling Light" (lawsuit forthcoming, natch.) With that out of the way, let's get down to the nitty gritty (and get this show on the road): PETA spokespeople have asked Phish to change their name ... to the "Sea Kittens."

Is this the stupidest thing ever and a blatant publicity stunt by an increasingly irritating organization hell-bent on punching everyone in America squarely in the eye? Most likely. Hence, a letter issued to media outlets!

The letter, addressed to Trey Anastasio, Jon Fishman, Mike Gordon and Page McConnell, says the request is an attempt to gain empathy for fish, "because few people are aware that fish are actually smart animals with personalities."

"For example, they communicate and develop relationships with one another, feel pain when injured (their lips are particularly sensitive, and they use them like we use our fingers), show affection by gently rubbing against other fish, and even grieve when other fish they like die," the letter continues.

OhmysweetGod. COME ON. I mean, really. REALLY? This is what it's come to now that Michael Vick has served his prison sentence and Phil Spector is no longer allowed to wear dead squirrels on his head? Harrassing a hippie-trust-funded jam band that doesn't seek in any shape or form to take empathy away from actual fish?

It's not even annoying anymore, it's just freaking sad.

Atlanta Airport Music Is Annoyingly Chipper

Airport music is airport music. It's never going to be something I want to personally listen to, just because it has to be generic and pleasing to everyone and whatnot. 

But the Atlanta airport has taken it to far, recently purchasing the rights to three R&B songs and then remaking them to be "clean." Literally.

 As part of an initiative to keep the airport clean and get people excited about the airport's new shops and dining options, officials there bought the rights to three popular R & B classics: "Shake Your Groove Thing" by Peaches and Herb, "Bustin' Loose" by Chuck Brown and the Soul Searchers and "Fantastic Voyage" by Lakeside.

With rights secured, Doug Strachan, Creative Innovations Manager for the City of Atlanta Department of Aviation, rewrote the lyrics and invited the original artists to record the revamped songs.

It's actually a pretty cool idea -- subliminally tricking people into thinking that they're somehow not miserable sitting in the airport waiting for 14 hours to get on a plane from Atlanta to New York. I mean, normally, you would think, "God, I hate my life." But in Atlanta, you think, "MAN. My miserable life feels really clean right now."

Okay, maybe that's a little sarcastic.  But still, I did "Get Your Clean Th-ing!" stuck in my head for the last hour, so I think it's the least I can offer.

New Kids on the Block - Cruise Edition

At PTG, we're never short on cruise information (for best possible results, we recommend reading the Family Cruise List) and we're certainly never shocked by things that happen in the travel world. Well, "never" might be a bit strong. Because I was pretty shocked when I found out that the New Kids on the Block would be hosting a reunion tour on a cruise ship.

Yes, you read that line correctly.

"Our manager tells us this is not a cheesy thing, this is not a step back," says [Joey] McIntyre in the video.

The New Kids ship hits the water from May 15-18, launching from Ft. Lauderdale, Fla., then heading to the Bahamas.

It will include musical performances and schmoozing.

"We're not going to be drinking pina coladas, we'll be serving them," McIntryre said.

It's almost, um, too good to believe, isn't it? Perhaps you've had a crush on Drama Donnie Wahlberg ever since you were rocking out braces. Or perhaps you've always just wanted to sit around at a cruise boat's pool, laugh with your friends and throw a margarita in Jordan Knight's face.

Either way, now's your time. Tickets go on sale this Wednesday, so you better get the jump on all those teeny boppers middle aged women that'll be first in line.